You know the feeling when your mind has reached its thinking capacity and is about to explode into shreds of membrane.

I have that. I just took my SATs. Man, another test, another score, another meaningless number. I mean, my worth isn't determined by a certain test that I take, is it? No, I think not.

The feeling is probably due to the fact that I crammed a bit too much into my head the day before. A suggestion: do not cram, it doesn't work, usually. I tried to memorize, what was it? 550 words in 2 hours before I went to sleep? So as I started taking the test, I felt good. That first Math section was pretty darn easy. Oh and hey that second Verbal section was not that bad either. But as the hour ticks away, I realize my persistent cramming the night before was daunting my performance in the latter Verbal Sections. Like, I'd recognize the words, they were on the list (550 word list), yet my mind drew a blank. I panicked. What am I to do now? What is to become of me? How will I ever succeed!?!? Calm down. It's just a test. --sigh-- right. just a test. I know that I'm not going to get a 1600 and I know I'm not going to get a 800 either. My mind gets the best of me and the intellectual part of Grace starts to freak when it doesn't know the precise, actual answer. Which, I admit, is pretty sad in my perspective. I have this mentality that I need to get a good score. Where from? I have yet to discover. Before I took the test, I vowed to devoted my time, my mind, my score, my answers, and even my pencil to God. God thank you for waking me up at 7:25 this morning to take this awful test. God thank you for my mind to think of You and devote to You. God thank you for giving me this pencil so I'm not the person beside me who ran out of lead. God thank you for fingers that I can simply write. God thank you for nerves to help me write and make me have physical feeling. Most of all God thank you for being real in every aspect, test or not, in my life.