"Atheism turns out to be too simple. If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning..." -C.S. Lewis
Friday, February 21, 2003
Friday, February 14, 2003
Happy Valentine's Day!!
Yay! I had a good day today. =) It makes me happy to see everybody so happy. hehe. My Accounting teacher, Ms. Metke, got a singing Valentine, which was fun. The girls sang the original version of "Your Song" by Elton John. Very neat. They've got beaauutiful voices. "L-O-V-E" was awesome too, very cute. I just wish I could have heard Justine and Annie sing. I heard they have some awesome voices. Oh, well, my happiness will fade away after dinner tonight so I'm enjoying every moment of having so much people love me. hehe. not really. It's just the spirit of Valentine's Day... Love is all around. WooHoo!
Yay! I had a good day today. =) It makes me happy to see everybody so happy. hehe. My Accounting teacher, Ms. Metke, got a singing Valentine, which was fun. The girls sang the original version of "Your Song" by Elton John. Very neat. They've got beaauutiful voices. "L-O-V-E" was awesome too, very cute. I just wish I could have heard Justine and Annie sing. I heard they have some awesome voices. Oh, well, my happiness will fade away after dinner tonight so I'm enjoying every moment of having so much people love me. hehe. not really. It's just the spirit of Valentine's Day... Love is all around. WooHoo!
Wednesday, February 12, 2003
everybody's getting sick. phooey. I think that's how the terrorists are attacking us. They spread the common cold disease so it would seem unthreatening because it is so common. And they'll swipe us out when we don't even know it...
not much logic to it, but hey it works for me.
I found out that a great deal of the "smart" people at my school are going to UT. They've already gotten their acceptance letters. They're guaranteed a spot for dorms. I, on the other hand, still need to wait. And it may as well be a rejection letter because...well...just because. sigh.
I'm not going to prom. I've already been rejected and stood up once. I'm scarred for life. haha. So, I'm not gonna go through it again.
I'm excited about friday. yay!
not much logic to it, but hey it works for me.
I found out that a great deal of the "smart" people at my school are going to UT. They've already gotten their acceptance letters. They're guaranteed a spot for dorms. I, on the other hand, still need to wait. And it may as well be a rejection letter because...well...just because. sigh.
I'm not going to prom. I've already been rejected and stood up once. I'm scarred for life. haha. So, I'm not gonna go through it again.
I'm excited about friday. yay!
Sunday, February 09, 2003
Sunday, February 02, 2003
Teen Mania Daily Devotion: Perfection (Knowing God Completely) February 2, 2003
"I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be." Philippians 3:12 NLT
Allow me to give you a quick, comprehensive reality check - you are not perfect...nor am I...nor is anyone! So, where does the idea of perfection come from anyways? Who says that we are to be perfect and what does it prove if we exemplify the meaning of the word, which means "faultlessness"? Striving for the kind of perfection that pleases yourself or others is not a requirement by God, it is an unattainable human idea. God knows that we were birthed from imperfectness and we must realize that the only "faultless" individual who walked this earth was Jesus and who can you compare him to?
Teachers have seen students have a nervous breakdown when they didn't receive an "A" on a paper; coaches have witnessed their players mentally beat themselves up if they lost a game and Pastors have counseled teens who feel ashamed for falling into sin. These examples show young adults who are desperately trying to aim for perfection. Their expectation level becomes so high that when they achieve any accomplishment, it never feels good because they think they could have done better. To them, it doesn't matter how many of their peers look to them with admiration because of their talent or how much their parents express how proud they are. There is a mental block that tells them that they are nothing unless everything they do in life is perfect. Am I speaking to you?
Let me speak even louder. There is no such thing as " perfection" . God only requires that you strive to reach its meaning in the way that brings glory to Him. He wants that you strive to live a life worthy of the calling He has given you and that you esteem His name in all that you do and say. He desires that you build your life around the structure of His word and live out the commandments that will bless YOU. God only wants to increase you; He never wants to take away from the endowments that you have been given.
There is a drive in you that wants to do things perfect. You want to dress perfect, sing perfect, play a sport perfect, be a perfect friend; however, with as much energy as you put into these miscellaneous things, are you putting as much effort into knowing God "perfectly"? Another definition of this word means "completely" and this is the only kind of "perfection" that God wants to instill in you...the idea of completely knowing Him. He wishes that you be the one testifying of His goodness and grace; He wishes that you be the one spreading His word; that your tongue speak of His unconditional love. Do not be a bystander; proclaim what God has done for you with zeal. "O LORD, I will honor and praise your name, for you are my God. You do such wonderful things! You planned them long ago, and now you have accomplished them." Isaiah 25:1 NLT
When you begin to know God intimately it will show. Others may ridicule your freedom of expression with the Lord. However, see it as their way of crying out for what they feel they cannot attain. But because you possess it, it becomes your job to guide them towards owning it. This is the kind of "perfection" that you want. It is healthy and will build you up; you will feel good about yourself and walk in the air of confidence.
While Jesus was on this earth, notice that the only thing he desired to do perfectly was to perform His fathers work "completely"; this too is what we should long after. God understands that we are going to fall short; He knows that this world has temptations and that, as humans, we are enticed to hold hands with sin. However, He expects more from us than just mediocre ways. If we are crying out unto God to fill our cup a little more each day, we cannot caress sin while at the same time pray for the Lord to expose more of His glory.
Now understanding that God wants us to know Him "perfectly"..."completely." We need to take a hold of what it means to persevere, then we will encounter the true meaning of what it means to be a Christian. As long as we are aiming for the bulls-eye, we will get better at hitting our mark!
"I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ Jesus saved me for and wants me to be." Philippians 3:12 NLT
Allow me to give you a quick, comprehensive reality check - you are not perfect...nor am I...nor is anyone! So, where does the idea of perfection come from anyways? Who says that we are to be perfect and what does it prove if we exemplify the meaning of the word, which means "faultlessness"? Striving for the kind of perfection that pleases yourself or others is not a requirement by God, it is an unattainable human idea. God knows that we were birthed from imperfectness and we must realize that the only "faultless" individual who walked this earth was Jesus and who can you compare him to?
Teachers have seen students have a nervous breakdown when they didn't receive an "A" on a paper; coaches have witnessed their players mentally beat themselves up if they lost a game and Pastors have counseled teens who feel ashamed for falling into sin. These examples show young adults who are desperately trying to aim for perfection. Their expectation level becomes so high that when they achieve any accomplishment, it never feels good because they think they could have done better. To them, it doesn't matter how many of their peers look to them with admiration because of their talent or how much their parents express how proud they are. There is a mental block that tells them that they are nothing unless everything they do in life is perfect. Am I speaking to you?
Let me speak even louder. There is no such thing as " perfection" . God only requires that you strive to reach its meaning in the way that brings glory to Him. He wants that you strive to live a life worthy of the calling He has given you and that you esteem His name in all that you do and say. He desires that you build your life around the structure of His word and live out the commandments that will bless YOU. God only wants to increase you; He never wants to take away from the endowments that you have been given.
There is a drive in you that wants to do things perfect. You want to dress perfect, sing perfect, play a sport perfect, be a perfect friend; however, with as much energy as you put into these miscellaneous things, are you putting as much effort into knowing God "perfectly"? Another definition of this word means "completely" and this is the only kind of "perfection" that God wants to instill in you...the idea of completely knowing Him. He wishes that you be the one testifying of His goodness and grace; He wishes that you be the one spreading His word; that your tongue speak of His unconditional love. Do not be a bystander; proclaim what God has done for you with zeal. "O LORD, I will honor and praise your name, for you are my God. You do such wonderful things! You planned them long ago, and now you have accomplished them." Isaiah 25:1 NLT
When you begin to know God intimately it will show. Others may ridicule your freedom of expression with the Lord. However, see it as their way of crying out for what they feel they cannot attain. But because you possess it, it becomes your job to guide them towards owning it. This is the kind of "perfection" that you want. It is healthy and will build you up; you will feel good about yourself and walk in the air of confidence.
While Jesus was on this earth, notice that the only thing he desired to do perfectly was to perform His fathers work "completely"; this too is what we should long after. God understands that we are going to fall short; He knows that this world has temptations and that, as humans, we are enticed to hold hands with sin. However, He expects more from us than just mediocre ways. If we are crying out unto God to fill our cup a little more each day, we cannot caress sin while at the same time pray for the Lord to expose more of His glory.
Now understanding that God wants us to know Him "perfectly"..."completely." We need to take a hold of what it means to persevere, then we will encounter the true meaning of what it means to be a Christian. As long as we are aiming for the bulls-eye, we will get better at hitting our mark!
Saturday, February 01, 2003
For the first time in my life, I've finally understood what true forgiveness is about, on both ends. Often times, I would ask for forgiveness with all my heart to a brother or sister. And yet, the usual reaction is a reflex as not to cause conflict or pain, usually saying, "oh its okay" I don't want that anymore. If deep down in your heart, YOU got problems with me. JUST FRICKIN let me know. I can't stand it when people just push things aside trying to avoid the problem. So i always have to double check by saying, "Are you sure? Are you positive? Avoiding the idea of being vulnerable to someone that could possibly hold you accountable. Anyway, I digress. I felt disappointed over the last week, with family, friends, work, school, and life in general. I don't handle my emotions well enough to understand fully the cause of a certain intense feeling. Feelings are flaky. Yes. But I want to keep them in check. So forgiveness is a great factor in the healing process.
I was bummed out about not going to Acquire the Fire. I heard raves over and over how it was awesome. The fire of the Holy Spirit was evident in the arena. I regretted passing up a chance to fellowship with other brothers and sisters my age, who enjoy God. Imagine going to a concert of your favoritest band. You've got posters of them all over your room, you've got all their cds, and will tape any performance shown on tv. That's me. Just not so idolizing.... soo not idolizing Teen Mania, just God. Anyway, I digress yet again.
So Alicia had asked me to go. I was like, uhhh (kinda apprehensive about it) and the topic was dropped. After a few days, I was like yeah, deep down I do. I was just afraid of going with her church because they already have a pretty tight knit group. I didn't want to just join in like I could blend in because i can't, some have the gift of doing that, i don't. So I emailed her, cause I didn't know her number or anything. I just knew her email. Next day, no reply. The day after, none. They day after that, nope. I was like, "uhh" I guess people don't check their email or they just dont like me. So I got pooped. I got shut down.
Tuesday of this week, the tuesday after the weekend of Acquire the Fire, she told me that she got my email monday night. She kept apologizing. I was like no no, don't apologize. She was like "i feel terrible, grace. It would have been great having you there. You have to accept my apology and I must make it up to you, or else. I'm really sorry." And for the first time, i felt sincerity in someone's apology. Sincerity. I'm not saying that people haven't been sincere. But I felt this one so strong. Like my Spirit yielded with gentleness i've never known before. Any sort of resentment or bitterness was lifted.
Forgiveness is a two way deal.
I was bummed out about not going to Acquire the Fire. I heard raves over and over how it was awesome. The fire of the Holy Spirit was evident in the arena. I regretted passing up a chance to fellowship with other brothers and sisters my age, who enjoy God. Imagine going to a concert of your favoritest band. You've got posters of them all over your room, you've got all their cds, and will tape any performance shown on tv. That's me. Just not so idolizing.... soo not idolizing Teen Mania, just God. Anyway, I digress yet again.
So Alicia had asked me to go. I was like, uhhh (kinda apprehensive about it) and the topic was dropped. After a few days, I was like yeah, deep down I do. I was just afraid of going with her church because they already have a pretty tight knit group. I didn't want to just join in like I could blend in because i can't, some have the gift of doing that, i don't. So I emailed her, cause I didn't know her number or anything. I just knew her email. Next day, no reply. The day after, none. They day after that, nope. I was like, "uhh" I guess people don't check their email or they just dont like me. So I got pooped. I got shut down.
Tuesday of this week, the tuesday after the weekend of Acquire the Fire, she told me that she got my email monday night. She kept apologizing. I was like no no, don't apologize. She was like "i feel terrible, grace. It would have been great having you there. You have to accept my apology and I must make it up to you, or else. I'm really sorry." And for the first time, i felt sincerity in someone's apology. Sincerity. I'm not saying that people haven't been sincere. But I felt this one so strong. Like my Spirit yielded with gentleness i've never known before. Any sort of resentment or bitterness was lifted.
Forgiveness is a two way deal.
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