Here I am, sitting in front of the screen. Listening to the lovely words sung by Josh Groban. I begin to think about leaving the house soon. My dad calls out, "Mei, mei!" I reply with a instant yelp, "WHAT?!" He's home from his whereabouts. I rush downstairs to greet him. He spreads his arms and welcomes me for a hug. "I can't believe you're going to college. Seems only yesterday that I was holding you in my arms as a baby. Now you're going off to college." He has the tendency to talk to me about profound ideas with intrigue and interest. He would always go, Grace, I'm telling you this for your own good. So that your mind develops faster and you are smart to do what's right. He is a very intelligent man with a deep love for family. After the hug, he cracks a joke about Michael and goes about his business. I run back upstairs to attend to my computer game.

I start to think about this last year. So much has happened. I went to a mission trip. I left the church. I went on to my senior year of school. I made new friends. I understood who I was for the first time in my life. I applied to college. I got into Baylor. I graduate. Now it's the summer. The only thing I can now think about is the fact that I've been through hell and back with my dad. This last year, I've loved him. For the first time, I love my dad. I use to wish he would die of cancer. I use to wish that he and my mom would get a divorce so that I could live without emotional baggage. But that is ridiculous. I love him. I love my dad. It has just occured to me. He's leaving for China on Tuesday, for business. Delicate drops of tears trickle from my eyes and down my face. You know how you imagine what it would be like to live without your parents? I seriously cannot imagine living without my father now. Forgive me for ever saying false things about my father. He's not to blame. He never was the one. I was. In my own stupidity and ignorance, I reproved my father for my own selfish reasons. Not to say he didn't hurt me at the time. But I shouldn't hate him for enforcing discipline on me. I finally understand with love comes discipline.

"And in your hands, the pain and hurt...
look less like scars,
and more like character."