crappola

i keep forgetting to call them! i need to stick a memo on my arm, CALL HER!

Happy Birthday to Amy Sung, Elaine Yeung, and Aaron Lee. 3 births in one day. nice.

I was reading some of my old posts earlier today. I realized something. I was really hungry!

I was truly hungry for God. When I had first became a believer, I really wanted to get to know Him. I wanted my inner parts to groan for his truth and it really did. I'd read the Bible as much as I could and try to understand things even with my inability to comprehend. My reading skills were never that great, by the way. I'd have to read passages over and over again to understand.

I don't know what happened in between then and now. I want to say that it's someone elses fault. I want to blame someone else. Then i think, there's no one to blame but yourself, Grace. You put yourself in situations. You put yourself in the place for ridicule and deceit.

No.

God has an interesting way of making my life a living hell, huh? God put me in and out of life's difficulties. So i would learn. Just as a baby learns to walk for the first time. He gradually eases his feet maybe a centimeter or an inch! just to reach from his cradle to the bottle on the table, in hope of appeasing his insatiable appetite. And just when he's courageous enough to take a few inches more, he falls! But with strength and will, he slowly reaches for the cradle and pulls himself up, out to try one more time.

I've fallen. I need to get up. I know God is with me. I know he is. Those tears I cry at night, it's because i want him. I know it. I just need to understand. I need to learn to understand. Will i choose to have courage or sit in cowardice?

here's a treat:

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan 82% Emergent/Postmodern 68% Fundamentalist 46% Classical Liberal 46% Neo orthodox 43% Roman Catholic 39% Charismatic/Pentecostal 32% Reformed Evangelical 32% Modern Liberal 29% What's your theological worldview? created with QuizFarm.com